Victoria Cakes Smashing The Pool Noodler 10 Better May 2026

Whether she competes against Gary or retires undefeated, one thing is certain: The phrase is now permanently etched into the canon of absurdist food sport history.

Victoria’s response? A single Instagram story showing her crushing a can of sparkling water with her bare thigh while eating a cupcake.

And it is, objectively, 10 better than anything we’ve seen before. Have you witnessed a 10 Better smash? Do you disagree with the Deca-Better Scale? Join the conversation in the comments below, and don’t forget to subscribe to our weekly Dessert Destruction Digest. victoria cakes smashing the pool noodler 10 better

But what does “10 better” mean exactly? It means better than a perfect 10 . It’s a meta-score—a score that breaks the scale. In the underground lexicon, if you are “10 better” than someone, you didn’t just beat them. You redefined what winning looks like. On August 17, 2024, at the Annual Tampa Bay Dessert Decimation , Victoria Cakes faced the largest pool noodler ever constructed: the “Megalodong Noodler” (32 inches long, 6.5 pounds, triple-layered with passion fruit guava filling).

Victoria approached the table. She did not warm up. She did not measure her grip. She simply looked at the pool noodler, whispered something inaudible (later revealed to be “sugar doesn't float”), and raised both hands like she was about to close a car trunk on a loaf of bread. Whether she competes against Gary or retires undefeated,

The pool noodler didn’t just collapse—it annihilated . The gelatin core ruptured symmetrically along three fault lines. Marshmallow fluff ejected in perfect radial arcs. The passion fruit guava filling formed a near-perfect heart shape at the center of the impact zone.

| Metric | Average Smasher (Level 6) | Victoria Cakes (10 Better) | |--------|----------------------------|-----------------------------| | Hand speed | 4.2 mph | 9.7 mph | | Impact surface area | Palm heels only | Full palm + finger wedge | | Follow-through depth | 2 inches below noodler top | 5.5 inches (through the table pad) | | Frosting scatter radius | 22 inches (exceeds limit) | 14.2 inches (perfect containment) | | Psychological intimidation | Low | High (opponents flinch pre-smash) | And it is, objectively, 10 better than anything

Her opponent? A four-time pool noodler champion known only as “The Float King.”